viernes, 25 de octubre de 2013

"THE WIFE OF..."



I would like to make a comment on one situation I came across in my practice as a lawyer. The situation took place last week.   Two people, a woman and a man, came to my office. They were a couple. They entered my box and sat down, a bit separately. She started talking about some things  and he kept interrupting her. She admonished him and strongly required being allowed her turn to speak. He kept quiet for a tiny little moment. Afterwards, he turned to interrupt her again. And the sketch went on, and on...
He had inscribed a land at her name, but later on, the registration of the land resulted in a whole trial against the poor woman, who had "only signed a paper". She had had faith on him... She had "only signed" the paper, without even reading it. (??). And the prosecution of the law came against her.
Thus, she was utterly angry with him ( I think, she was quite angry with herself, too). She said TO ME,  in FRONT OF HIM, that the problematic was bound to cause their divorce.
It was an awful situation, wasn´t it?  And picture ME in front of them trying to calm down the nerves of us all... We lawyers are not psychologists, you know...

Beyond the legal issue, the situation made me reflect upon our role as women. How is it that a woman can "sign a paper", without questioning it, just because the husband asks so? We should keep our independence at all times. If not, somebody will come to remind us that (in fact) we are quite alone with our own lives, we are "ourselves", and not "the wife of" another person. 

4 comentarios:

  1. I ABSOLUTELY AGREE WITH YOU!! Besides, we should never sign a paper without reading it. This is also related to Wan's post as regards honesty. This poor? woman trusted her husband and he was doing something he wasn't supposed to. How awful!
    I could picture you in this situation, Ade.

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  2. You are right and, in fact, since you are a lawyer, you know you are right, haha! But, how could this woman sign such an important paper without giving it at least a quick reading? Maybe she was too naive and didn't actually believe that her husband could harm her in any way. But, that's not an excuse for her not reading what she is signing. Poor you, Adela, for having to calm their nerves down and see that situation!

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  3. I like your idea of women keeping their own independence at all times. I would never sign a paper without reading it just because my husband asks me to do so. But well, it is obvious that even in the 21st century there are some women who still do it. I think that a factor that influences a lot is the way you have been brought up and the education you have received throughout your life. For instance, I grew up hearing my mother say “I´m Nora Sanchez, I´m not Nora de Clark”. And the truth is that I do not want to change my surname either. I feel proud of whom I am and even though I am also proud of being my boyfriend´s girlfriend I do know that I belong to me and to me only. With him I´ve decided to share my life, but that´s it and that´s enough. Ha!ha!

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  4. I can imagine you in that situation Ade. All stressed out and trying to be as polite as you can in order to cool down the situation. This is the problem with papers and contracts. You always have to read the "SMALL LETTER" (I think this is transfer, the teacher will kill me,haha) and in that case you wouldn´t have to face this kind of problems. We are human beings who were born free and as such we don´t BELONG to anyone, we are not a product you can buy or sell. I really like what Marcela says because that is what my mom repeats as well: "I´m married to your dad, but I´m not ROSANA FRANASIK DE TOLABA, I´m ROSANA FRANASIK DE NADIE". I always laugh when she says so but she is right actually.

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